Friday 30 March 2012

FRIDAY FICTIONEERS - 30 of March - ANOTHER FUTURE - Her 100 Words - Linda Palund




ANOTHER FUTURE

Five years later, they found the truck. Crazy that it took them so long to find it. You’d have thought someone would have noticed it rusting in that field.
They never found her, though. She would have been ten years old by then. He’d have given her another identity. In time she would have forgotten us, her kitten, her mother, and me.
He would have found her another kitten by then. He was good that way.
He’d left the truck behind to rot. He left us behind to grieve. And he carried her away to another future, one without us.


18 comments:

  1. What a sad and powerful story. Great job!

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  2. I like how this is open-ended, leaving it up to the reader to figure out what that future entails. Excellent use of the prompt.

    Here's mine: http://unspywriter.wordpress.com/2012/03/30/friday-fictioneers-yay/

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  3. This was good, and a novel take on the prompt. It's not only sad, there's a kind of wistful voice in there. Nice one. Hope you're feeling better soon.

    http://castelsarrasin.wordpress.com/2012/03/30/i-met-this-guy-friday-fictioneers-30-march-2012/

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  4. Oh wow. Such a tragic story. Great emotion.

    Mine's at http://shirleymccann.blogspot.com/2012/03/fitting-end.html

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  5. Lindaura, that was very good. You always tell a real story, it's heartfelt and sadly fatalistic, and this is no exception. Nice bit with the kitten, too. You should have told the story of Calvin.

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  6. Lindaura, that was very good. You always tell a story, heartfelt and sadly fatalistic. That was a nice bit with the kitten. You should have told the story of Calvin instead of me.

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  7. This was VERY good Lindaura! Excellent story!

    My link is here: https://quillshiv.wordpress.com/2012/03/30/for-a-moment-sam/

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  8. This is very spooky. For some reason, I decided in my head that the narraotr was a stepfather and the kidnapper her Dad, rather than a nasty stranger. But maybe I'm just looking for a bright side.

    I found the parallel sentence structure of leaving the truck behind to rot and the [parents] to grieve particularly moving.

    I’m over here (also lurking in the shadows: http://wp.me/p1PeVl-69

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    Replies
    1. Actually, when I wrote it, I was thinking as the older sister, but when I finished, I could see that I could be the father. But my guess it is the other way around. The welcome stranger, befriending the family, to take the little girl away in the end.
      ON to yours!

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  9. Sad but wonderfully written. you've conveyed the horror and sadness of a child's kidnapping perfectly. I think this is a wonderful hook for a full-length novel. Very well done.

    Mine: www.vlgregory-circa1800.vpweb.com/blog.html

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  10. I love this piece too...though i would rather hope for a better future he too her to than for those mourning her now...thanks for bringing this on board.

    http://seewilliams.wordpress.com/2012/03/30/iron-wall/

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  11. I am very impressed with this story, Linda. Happens all too often, and I loved the last paragraph. Well done.

    http://tedstrutz.com/2012/03/30/flash-fridayfictioneers-lost-opportunity/?preview=true&preview_id=795&preview_nonce=5782857aeb

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  12. Oh. Sad!! Kidnapping it sounds like. Heart wrenching.

    My attempt: http://unduecreativity.wordpress.com/2012/03/28/state-pride/

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  13. This sad story touched my heart. You have the beginning of something here...continue with it. Here's mine:
    www.triplemoonstar.blogspot.com

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  14. This was achingly sad and not easily re-read. A great story, especially considering you are under the weather. Drink lots of fluid and rest well.

    Aloha,

    Doug

    http://ironwoodwind.wordpress.com/2012/03/30/pure-coincidence/

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  15. Thanks, Doug. You made me chuckle, as I am allright now. That was just the jetlag catching up with me - so not sleeping for 7 days, made me sick for just one day - and forced me to sleep! I wasn't ill when I wrote the story.
    That damn truck made me think of a thousand stories, so it was hard to pick one. I let this one write itself up to the last line. I like the story because of that last line.
    See you next week,
    Laura

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  16. Really grabs my heart, Linda, and a totally new direction for you. I liked it a lot. (Hey check out my new Blogger commenting, lol)

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  17. Thanks, Madison, but what is that new Blogger commenting? And, I have to admit something really embarrassing. I do not know what "lol" means. I thought it might mean "lots of love" but I am not sure. I kind of missed the beginning of all the abbreviations...
    Yours wondering,

    Linda Lindaura

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